Demetri Martin

So I saw Levi MacDougall tonight. Very interesting. I didn't even know who he was until tonight. I actually went to see Demetri Martin originally, but this guy showed up on stage. I did enjoy his performance though. DEMETRI MARTIN! DEMETRI MARTIN! I was very happy to get a ticket the day before the show. It was hilarious. I definitely laughed more tonight than I normally do when I watch him online. I'm not sure if he's funnier in person or not. I think it might have to do with the fact that I was not alone and did not feel like a loser when I laughed at something funny. Yeah I watch comedy shows when I'm alone, and I don't laugh. So I guess it's just because I feel kind of pathetic when I'm alone and laughing out loud. So I got to let my fake hair down tonight and laugh my non-existent face off.

But here is the creepy part. After the show I left (shocking!) I had gone by myself as I didn't know Roommate's plans for the evening. As I was leaving the building, this guy and I made eye-contact. Oh golly...Then he started talking to me. I didn't want to be rude, so I answered him and we conversed about the show. We went one block and I had to go straight, and he went straight. Another block the same thing. And again. It got a little strange after a while. But this James character and I were walking around, conversing, I now know plenty about him, but when we got to my street, I paused. He asked where I lived. I pointed in the opposite direction or my building and said, "up there some place." Here's the thing. I was pretty damn sure the guy was gay. It was just something about him that just made my gay-dar go off, but I really didn't want to assume.

My moment of glory for the night: James was confused for a second as to where to go. He said he had to get to 6th Avenue, and he didn't know where to go. He's a New Yorker even, though he is from Queens. I gave him directions! I felt so proud of myself. After only being here for 17 days, I was able to give someone directions! Happy Happy Happy Me!

An Encounter of the Creepy Kind

Some people are just creepy. Not in the good way either, you know like how your best-est ever friend knows where you are creepy, but a complete stranger stopping you in the middle of the street to talk to you creepy. Well tonight I was initiated into the creepy part of the New York night life. Being the tourist that I am I was walking down Times Square and taking pictures. Then this guy tells me that it's illegal to film in New York. "Yeah sure..." but I put my phone away because I have had more than my fair share of dealings with undercover cops. Then as I cross the street the same guy says to me, "Can I ask you a question? If a guy were to tell you that you're cute, what would you say?" My first response: "I would say I'm gay."
Now ladies, that is a go-to response that we all use to frighten off the creepers, but I was being honest. He seemed harmless, but maybe it was just his use of the word "cute." Anywhich he says to me, "That's cool; I'm a girl."
Really? You would go with that? Anything but that please. You really seem to want to have sex or at least hang around me for a little bit, but do you seriously think I would find that funny? Or could he have been serious? What kind of randy git would want to bang a lesbian who thought that the overly obvious man was a woman? Would anyone want to even date someone that stupid?
This city is full of weird people, so is the state, and Virginia, and the rest of the country, and the world...Mars is probably full of weird people too, hopefully Rumbleroar keeps an eye on those ones.
Going back over the situation, I can think of other things I could have used, depending on how I wanted the situation to go. "You're cute" could have been followed with "Yeah I know" or "What you looking at?" or "So is that puppy" or even the classic "Fuck off" though that one could be seen as an invitation by the more perverted minds. Really I could have gone a million ways with that one scenario, and I'm sure anyone else could too, except for the girl that fell for his act..
I walked away and kept checking over my shoulder if he was following me, but that's the thing about these New York creepy guys, they know they've only got 1 shot. Back in Virginia they don't care what you say, they just keep on coming. This creepy is tolerable and even good for the occasional laugh, but I don't ever want to tangle with those southern boys again.